Getting my oats....

I don't know if I have a genuine wheat intolerance since I've never been tested for it but I do know that when I limit wheat products, my word, I feel SO much better! ;o) It has to be said that I do love bread but in the interests of feeling healthier I am trying to keep it at a maneageble level and there's lots of groovy new things to try, oh I love trying new foods and different recipes! ;o) However I'm digressing a little as I'm here to share an oaty post or two on a blog I lurk about on from time to time. Those of you in Scottish climes will have heard of Skirlie, a savory oat dish. I hadn't heard of it but found this post about it on Mostly Eating. I really like the look of it and will be having a go at it this week I think. Also, check out this post on there too, lots of oaty ideas! ;o) Particularly like the look of these fruit, nut and Tahini bars! I have trouble with breakfast ideas at times and I think these would hit the spot perfectly. ;o)

Oops, I did it again!

Been slack in posting here I mean! ;oD So, let's see where I'm at....ok, so I've done a U-turn or three since I started this blog, one of which is that I've been persuaded into weekly weigh ins! The numbers are still just that but I have to admit it is a useful tool. ;o) If I start to spot any signs of obsession then I will stretch my weigh ins to fortnightly but for the time being all's well in this department. I've now lost 19lbs and am feeling increasingly energetic and healthy. ;o) One of my other U-turns is to use a food diary, my word it's years since I did this! I have found this an even more useful tool than weighing in. I'm not counting calories, points, sins, units, or anything else, my basic premise is "eat less, do more", so keeping a record of what I'm eating has been an interesting experience. This week, looking back over the last seven weeks, which is when I started keeping a record of my quaffing, I've realised that I'm eating quite a limited variety of foods which maybe good from the point of view of that recent TV programme, 10 Things You Need to Know About Losing Weight, but I am heading towards a jaded palette and my tastebuds need a bit of a tickle I think! For lunch today I knocked up some roasted veg - butternut squash, onions, carrots and beetroot roasted in a little oil with smoked paprika and herbs. Yum yum! ;o) Smoked paprika is my spice of the moment, I adore it!

Oops where did June go??

Feelish somewhat sheepish after a lengthy holiday from my blog! However I'm back and have some updating to do!

I now weigh in at 18st 12lb having lost 12lbs so far. My BMI has dropped below 40 (it's 39 now) and I've lost an inch each off bust, waist and hips. More improtantly I'm feeling much more energetic and healthy! Happy days! ;o) Dashing out but back with more later!

Salad Dressing (Up)

I'm a big fan of salad (yes really!) but I can't bear salad that just consists of just lettuce, cucumber and tomato! Salad should be interesting, make some tastebuds pop a bit, be more than limp greenery! My basic salad component recommendations would be lettuce (and not just the limpo green variety!) , alternative leaves (I have been known to ferret about in the garden!), rocket, spinach, radish, cucumber, tomato (if you can bear them raw, unlike me!), onion, spring onion, cress, sprouted seeds (particular favourites are alfalfa and fenugreek), apple, carrot, grapes (my husband loathes fruit in his salad but personally I love it!), raw peas, mange tout, sweetcorn, beetroot (of the unpickled variety, I like pickled beetroot but really like it without as well), ummm, I'm sure there's more but that'll do to be going on with! I also like to have a wee topper for my salad, just a sprinkle (tablespoon max) of something deemed illicit (by those pesky diet touting folk!) perks up a salad no end in my opinion! ;o) I'd go with pine nuts, raw nuts (walnuts, brazils, cashews, peanuts etc), Bacos (love these but a tad chemical!), fried crispy onion, croutons (home made though not those nasty processed jobbies), a smidgeon of grated cheese, sesame seeds, that's just a few but you're getting my point that salad should not be allowed to bore our palates to death in the name of healthiness!!

The numbers on the scale.....

....tell me that I haven't gained any weight from my culinary loose behaviour in la belle France last week! ;o) I think the exercise of being a tourist (ick!) plus the hot weather causing me to glow somewhat balanced out the extra goodies I was partaking of! So, onwards to healthiness!

Bonjour normality!

Ok, long gap between posts, reason being a manic few weeks including a jaunt to France from last Friday until yesterday. Zut alors, they know how to eat in la belle France! They'd never manage the Atkins Diet given their penchant for bread!! I love the relaxed pace of meals when I'm over there but I have to confess to eating rather more cheese, pastry and bread than is good for me! As it was a twinning visit I was staying in the home of a perfect stranger and as always, being a very well mannered girl, I felt obliged to eat whatever was put on the table! So, plenty of excuses for what has gone before but now it's back to reality!

Before I went away I had mentioned goals/targets but had employed my considerable powers of distraction to avoid blogging about the issue! I hadn't planned to talk about it now but it's as good a time as any so I thought I might as well plunge in with some possibly vague goal talk!

Ok, so weight wise....bit of a dodgy area goal wise this one! For me, the numbers on the scale are just that - numbers on the scale! Ok, it's a useful way to track progress but I am of the ilk that becomes obsessive when subjected to weekly weigh ins (I have a friend who weighs herself every bloody morning despite me practically begging her not to subject herself to it but that's a whole different post!) and to be honest I'm not really concerned about what the dial whizzes round to, I'm more concerned about how I feel and how I look. That said, my plan was to weigh on a monthly basis and my next date with the wicked weighing device was to be monday but I may well hop on tomorrow morning to assess the French damage and know where I'm now batting from! So, boringly, there is no weight loss goal for me to ticker tape my way to!

So, what goals do I have?

Well, firstly I want to get my BMI down to 30 as a starter. 40.8 is not a good place for it, or me, to be. In fact I think technically it makes me morbidly obese, oh joy! I haven't got much clue as to how swiftly I can achieve a BMI of 30 but I'm think it won't happen in the next week or three! So, in the absence of any scientific information, I'm plumping for getting there by Christmas. If I discover that's seriously unrealistic I'll rethink!

My second goal revolves around dress size. Currently a size 22/24 my long term goal is to be a size 16/18. My shorter term goal on this front is to be a size 20 by September. Possibly a tad over ambitious but that's what I'm shooting for currently.

Thirdly....an exercise goal! Now, as Julia Roberts would say, this is a slippery little sucker! Given my Achilles tendon issues this is the one goal I have to be very careful about. Obviously I do not want to run the risk of re-tearing my tendon but, on the other hand, I'm determined to get back to regular exercise. The one thing I can do is walk! And, let it be said, I've just about knocked the limp on the head, yippeeeee! So my current walking goal is to walk for a minimum of 20 minutes a day. I can also cycle so with the prospect of some more summery weather afoot I shall be working some pedal time into my schedule. Other than that I also want to work on some toning/strenghtening routines and look into Pilates.

And, forthly, food goals! I know from past experience that I feel really well when I restrict my dairy intake and, more so, my bread intake so I shall be working on those. I can be a sucker for processed junk at times and this raised it's ugly head whilst I was in plaster and subsequently in a surgical boot as my husband and daughter just bought "bung it in the oven" crap as I wasn't cooking! It's kind of hung on a bit so that's one to knock on the head ASAP. I can also be a bit of a Diet Coke fiend at times although not nearly as bad as I have been in days gone by. It gives me wind bloats me and is chemical rubbish I don't need. Other than that it's the usual - eat more fruit/veg and drink more water.

It's too late (or do I mean early??) to elucidate anymore so I'm away to my bed! A bientot!

Up a bit, left a bit......fire!

Ok, so what am I aiming for with my health quest? Not an easy question to answer, once upon a time my reply would have been "to be skinny" but no longer!

Firstly, losing some weight will obviously improve my health. I have knee, back and neck problems which are all much improved just by losing a little weight and, given my size, the strain on all my joints and organs in general can't be good. My recent Achile's tendon tear which lead to a DVT and PE meant I faced my mortality for probably the first time in my life. The whole experience has definitely changed me and, at times, it's been a struggle to come to terms with the way I feel. The reactions of those closest to me have been many and varied, some have mystified me, some have upset me, but pretty much all were not what I might have expected! None of this is of importance here really, I'm just trying to illustrate where my current determination to get healthy stems from. ;o) I'm 43, life is rushing past and my recent health problems have made me realise that the old chestnut about life being too short and you never know what's around the next corner is bloody well true! I want to make the most of my life and getting healthier will mean I can enjoy it even more and, hopefully, for a lot longer!!

The second factor for me is clothes! I'm about to sound really vain I suppose but one of the things that bothers me about being this size is the lack of choice in the clothes department. Ok, yes, it has improved alot in recent years, big girls are no longer facing a choice of Evans or bugger all but that said, I can't dress, or shop for clothes, in the way I want to and that really gets me down. I want to express my personality, my passion, my life, through the clothes I wear and I just can't do that at this size.

They really are the main two reasons to get fitter and healthier! I'm not sure if that's good or bad! Perhaps I should just tack on something else......I also want....world peace! ;oD It's the inner beauty queen in me! LOL

Now, down to the nitty gritty.....goals! Eek! I'm very goal challenged at the moment, finding it really difficult to actually make any, but I know I need them, immediate, short term and long term. I'm off to London shortly, just overnight but will give my goals some thought and report back tomorrow evening.

And in explanation of my blog title, the words are from a song, Not Perfect, by the gorgeous, funny and talented Mr Tim Minchin!

Where I'm at....

Ok, here we go with a few stats to illustrate where I'm at in the health arena....

Weight - 19st 10lb (276lbs or 125kg)

BMI - 40.8

Measurements - Bust 51" Waist 49" Hips 50"

Dress size - 22/24

I'm 5' 9" tall and I have a big frame.

For those of you who are offended by naked flesh or fat or both LOOK AWAY NOW as there's a photo featuring alot of both about to appear!

This photo was taken a wee while ago, before I tore my tendon, and I probably weighed less then but not by much and I wanted a shot that made no bones about what I'm dealing with. Now, wanna hear something interesting? I actually like this pic of me! Shock horror, a fat woman claiming she likes herself, whatever next?? LOL This pic is one from a shoot I did for pics for a self portrait as part of a body image project I'm working on this year. I've struggled with my body image for donkey's years and only began to grasp loving and accepting myself in the last year or so. This photo shoot was the single most empowering thing I have ever done for myself. I firmly believe that the only basis to work from if you want to change things about yourself is to love and accept yourself first, yes first! I've spent years loathing my body, hating myself for what I am, and batting from that position does not work. I know now that I have the power to change, to get healthier, because I love myself enough to finally give myself what I need. So, who's shocked that I can accept myself looking this way??

It's getting late so I'll post about my aims tomorrow.

Welcome!

Another blog about another soul on the road to health! ;o)

So, a little bit of background info to start with, enough to whet your appetite (ha ha!) not so much as to bore you to tears! I'm in my early 40s, married with a daughter, living in East Anglia, working as an artist. My "battle" with food, body image and my weight began in the dim and distant past when, as a teenager, I was terribly bullied at school. Unable to confide in anyone food became my refuge. Fairly swiftly food then became the enemy as I rapidly starting to gain weight. I embarked on my first diet when I was 14 or 15, looking back I really didn't need to, yes, I was a little plump but that innocent first diet sent me spiralling into years of self destructive behaviour. I've tried them all over the years, grapefruit, fruit only, liquid, WW, Slimming World, counting calories, fat units, points or whatever, milk & banana, Rosemary Conley, cabbage soup, three on two off, food combining, high fibre.....the list is endless and booooooooring! I've never been anorexic or bulimic but compulsive eating? Oh yes yes yes! It's really only been in the last five years that I have finally started to get to grips with it all.

So, why this blog? I recently tore my Achiles's tendon and my subsequent immobility whilst in plaster induced an undetected deep vein thrombosis leading to a pulmonary embolism. I'm on the road to recovery now but I know this is my time to improve my health.

More tomorrow, ahem, do I mean later today?! Stay tuned for stats and nekkid pics! ;oD